Posts filed under “Books & Literature”

COPYRIGHT NOTICE.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, recited into a Dictaphone, applied as a wallpaper pattern, etched in pewter, translated into Latin hexameters, spelled out in cupcakes, mumbled in a monotone under your breath, scrawled on the side of a goat, tapped out in Morse code in your lonely cell in solitary confinement, or skywritten without a note from your mother.

NAMES ONE WISHES ONE HAD MADE UP.

Recently Dr. Boli began the arduous task of adding the series Rerum Britannicarum Medii Aevi Scriptores to his Eclectic Library. It is arduous because there are at least 99 parts in the series, and many of the parts are themselves sets of multiple volumes, and most on-line-libraries have no notion of how to deal with multiple-volume sets. Hathi Trust can deal with them if they are all from the same library’s collection, but the most complete set at Hathi Trust is missing many of the volumes, and Hathi Trust books are restricted in their use in ways that books from Google Books and the Internet Archive are not.

These bibliographical complaints, however, are not our subject today. The subject is the names of the editors, and occasionally of the authors. A large number of nineteenth-century English scholars bore names that Dr. Boli finds himself wishing he had invented for some work of fiction. Here is a short list of such names. In each case it would be worth writing a novel just for the purpose of including a character with that name.

Sir Travers Twiss

The Rev. Walter Waddington Shirley

John Eyton Bickersteth Mayor

The Rev. Oswald Cockayne (editor of Leechdoms, Wortcunning, and Starcraft of Early England, which would certainly figure in the novel)

Sir Thomas Duffus Hardy

The Rev. John Williams ab Ithel

N. E. S. A. Hamilton

The Rev. James F. Dimock

Reginald Pecock, D.D., sometime Lord Bishop of Chichester

The Rev. Francis Charles Hingeston

Edward Edwards (we would make him Edward E. Edwards, and he would reveal near the end of the story that the E stands for Ethelbrecht)

And, of course, the constantly mutating publisher Longman, Brown, Green, Longmans [sic], & Roberts; Longman, Green, Longman, and Roberts; Longman, Green, Longman, Roberts, and Green; &c. This would be what the photoplay writers call a running gag.

 

THE ANSWER.

The answer to yesterday’s challenge is…

A one-volume open-source edition of Thomas Aquinas’ Summa Theologica.

Of course it makes complete sense once you know the answer. Somewhere in the vast forest of the Summa you know there must be all the information you need to understand the conspiracy of Jimmy Carter, Lee Harvey Oswald, and the Templars to channel orgone energy via Tesla technology to kill Tupac.

GUESS THE BOOK FROM THE TOPICS.

Dr. Boli’s own library is quite comprehensive and usually adequate for most tasks. When last he sent his secretary in there to look for a book, however, the poor man was lost for four days, and might have been lost longer had he not been tracked down by a team of St. Bernard dogs kept expressly for that purpose. For that reason Dr. Boli will often have resort to the Internet Archive, a smaller but still very well-stocked collection, when he needs to refer quickly to some volume or other.

And that brings us to our challenge tonight. The Internet Archive provides a list of “topics” for each book in the collection. Of course these “topics” are specified by whoever uploaded the book, which means they tend to be a bit haphazard. Your challenge (the answer will appear in this space shortly) is to see whether you can identify the book that goes with this list of topics, which is reprinted verbatim:

antony sutton, tragedy and hope, bill cooper, pale horse, dope inc, Michael Hutchison, neurology, hypnotism, hypnosis, talmud, occult, nazis, sklar, milton erickson, gemstone file, lucifers lodge, russian mind control, silent weapons for quiet wars, iron mountain, unauthorized bush, kabbalah, nicola tesla, gordon brown, tony blair, mengele, CIA, MI6, MI5, knights malta, knights saint john, vatican, cabbalah, pope, dia, mossad, manicheanism, aleister crowley, golden dawn, stella matututina, stelle group, IRS, mormons, qabbalah, magick, occult, Sherman Skolnick, anton levay, wilson bryan key, subliminal, backmasking, tantra, oto, kali, aleister crowley, diana, crone, maiden, mother, osiris, isis, antichrist, eluesinian, jim marrs, jose delgado, black magic, discoverie witchcraft, witch cult, malleus maleficarum, mkultra, mknaomi, monarch, christopher marlowe, ben johnson, shakespeare, queen elizabeth, occult theocrasy, king james, king james bible, webster tarpley, genesis, holy blood holy grail, jefferson, washington, lincoln, kennedy, john f kennedy, be wise as serpents, jfk, HAARP, federal reserve, nikola tesla, william lyne, lyne, tesla technology, marilyn monroe, Jolly West, Trotsky, michael hoffman, Lenin, Stalin, Tavistock, Kurt Lewin, Kaiser Institute, Thule, Golden Dawn, wilhelm reich, skull and bones, brownsville murders, michael cremo, occult world power, FIB, CIA, DEA, DHs, FEMA, KGB, FSB, MI6, BUSH, plot against church, cheney, rumsfeld, soros, pickens, texas, california, earth, russia, uk, australia, elizabeth dilling, nwo, three mile island, fukushima, chernobyl, tsunami, 9-11, earthquake, flying saucer, Khomeini, ayatollah, coughlin, british intelligence, hegel, dialectic, marx, unshackled, jimmy carter, collins, chavkin, mknaomi, witchcraft, eustace mullins, MLK, MLK Jr, Gandhi, gerald ford, jimmy carter, obama, bush, wackenhut, chevron, arco, propaganda bernays, cargill, carlyle, dresden, genocide, population control, ezekial, jeremiah, isaiah, daniel, prophet, john coleman, malachi, zechariah, trilateral, bilderberg, club rome, orgone, wilhelm reich, einstein, HAARP, ELF waves, henry ford, GWEN towers, Cell towers, Schuman, alice baily, annie besant, leadbeater, clymer swynburne, strom thurmond, john todd, holocaust, report iron mountain, jolly west, dr. cameron, edward teller, ac clarke, rasputin, holography, holographic, star wars, george lucas, NSA, protocols elders zion, david hoggan, hillary clinton, obama, mcveigh, lee harvey oswald, jack ruby, scientology, rfk, sirhan, walmart, sion, monsanto, bank england, chinese, osama bin laden, microsoft, mob, cosa nostra, chandra levy, pedophilia, pedophiles, gnosticism, rudy guiliani, madonna, britney spears, tiger woods, michael jordan, hollywood, speilberg, brownsville murders, satanic verses, salmon rushdie, epiphanius, stephen king, silver star, ted bundy, charlie manson, manson, moses, jesus christ, God, aristotle onassis, jacky kennedy, panarion, process church, animal sanctuary utah, california, arizona, new mexico, city london, zurich, berlin, lyon, france, tower of babel, johnny depp, depp, apocalypse, revelation, anne frank, sufis, sufism, etruscans, rome, caesar, new lies for old, herod, jolly west, holographic, holography, bohm, talbot, universe, cryptography, mojave secrets, atlantis, suvarov, auschwitz, quantum mechanics, victor thorn, bjerknes, hellstorm, mental health, pnac, bowart, aquino, bolshevism, pranaitis, fdr, swinburne, tupac, 2pac, michael jackson, james dean, elizabeth taylor, steve mcqueen, marlon brando, charleton heston, william still new world order, tom cruise, brad pitt, alex jones, jordan maxwell, james shelby downard, king kill 33, Arrhur Nelson Field, Douglas Dewar, James Bryce, Lord Bryce, hitler, Nelson Mandela, Mandela, abortion, planned parenthood, hollywood, food, water, money, air, truth, windsors, arthur nelson, john kerry, senator byrd, strom thurmond, bob hope, iron man, ironman, superman, batman, elon musk, rothschilds, bill gates, steve jobs, tony stark, tin man, great depression, IMF, World Bank, audrey hepburn, catholic, catholic church, rockefellers, st augustine, augustine, jerome, st jerome, catholic fathers, dalai lama, tibetan buddhism, sex magick, sex, gnosticism, astors, tridentine mass, catholic mass, vatican II, vatican 2, ottaviani, lefebvre, dietrich hildebrand, fatima, la salette, quito, dupont, holy virgin mary, virgin mary, sspx, pius x, leo xiii, pius xii, pius v, paul vi, john paul i, john paul ii, i.g. farben, benedict xvi, pope, flat earth, flat earth society, zetetic, rowbotham, nasa fraud, nasa, iss, parallax, vickers, zetetic society, galen winsor, nuclear hoax, free energy, antarctica, arctic, fritz springmeier, HAARP Angels, Christina Stoddard, freemasons, standard oil, illuminati, ralph rene, rene, tesla problem, mkultra, monarch, nwo, russian revolution, luciferians, satanism, operation paperclip, marx, wurmbrand, prainatis, Lana Del Rey, Jared Leto, Lookout Mountain, Houdini, Doors, Jim Morrison, Black Dahlia, mengele, Jack Nickolson, Marlon Brando, Henry Fonda, Laurel Canyon, satan, tv, radio, internet, video games, china lake, twenty nine palms, fahey, hoffman, jesuits, black pope, makow, anthony sutton, brice taylor, cathy o’brien, fire in the minds, mind control, hechethorn, secret societies, franklin coverup, golden bough, enoch, satanic voices, satanism, cathars, templars, stalin, lenin, hitler, nazis, phallicism, eleusinaian, hinduism, lhasa, tibet, ritual human sacrifice, wurmbrand, marx and satan, dunblane, columbine, newtown, plot against church, pope, jesuits, mind hypnosis dantalion jones, trance-formation, aquino, beatles, led zeppelin, doors, farrell, ss, federal reserve, bank of england, chase bank, goldman sachs

A PRINCIPLE OF BIBLICAL HERMENEUTICS.

When a writer says something like “It is shocking how accurate the Bible is concerning this RFID microchip,” you may safely dismiss his interpretation of any arbitrary passage in Scripture. This will save you quite a bit of time when, for example, such a writer leaves a 3,675-word comment on an article in your Celebrated Magazine.

From DR. BOLI’S UNABRIDGED DICTIONARY.

The Western Hemisphere, home of non-Western cultures. (Map by Sean Baker from Wikimedia Commons.)

Non-Western (adjective).—Having to do with indigenous cultures in places outside Europe, such as, e.g., the Western Hemisphere, Europe being mostly in the Eastern Hemisphere and thus defined as the West.

FRENCH TYPEFOUNDERS ARE, ABOVE ALL, FRENCH.

Our Eclectic Library keeps an extensive collection of type specimen books, mostly from English and American typefounders. Most of the earlier ones are content with the standard “Quosque tantrum a butter, Caterliny, patent nostrum”* text from Cicero; later Americans sometimes indulged in surreal flights of humor. But it should not surprise us that French typefounders turn out to be French. This is a translation of a sample of Gros Romain type from a 1917 French type catalogue:

A young Egyptian, seized with love for the courtesan Theognis, dreamed one night that he lay with her, and felt his passion ebb when he awoke. The courtesan having found out brought him before the court, and demanded her recompense of him, on the grounds that she had cured his passion and satisfied his desire. The judge ordered that the young man should bring the promised sum in a purse; that he should toss it into a bowl, and that the courtesan should be paid with the sound and the color of the coins, as the Egyptian was contented with an imaginary pleasure. This judgment was approved by all.

This is exactly the sort of thing American and British typefounders did not include in their samples in 1917, or ever.

*This is how Artemus Ward remembered it.