ARE YOU GULLIBLE? Volunteers are needed for a large placebo-controlled study of a new placebo. Placebos are an incredibly powerful new class of drugs that harness positive mental energy to solve all your problems and make all your dreams come true. We need gullible people who have the strength of character to be persuaded that nothing is something. Payment will be made in state-lottery tickets. Apply in person at Memorial Hospital, service entrance. Ask for Britney.