Dear Dr. Boli: Why do laws exist? —Sincerely, Samantha in Mr. McRoberts’ Fifth-Period Civics Class, and if you could get me an answer before the bell rings that would really help.

Dear Miss: You will hear two completely incompatible theories about why laws exist. The idealists will say that laws exist to protect the poor and humble from the depredations of the powerful. The cynics will say that laws exist to maintain the ascendancy of the powerful over the poor and humble.

However, the real answer is much more pragmatic. Laws exist to give legislators something to do, thus keeping them off the streets. If you have ever met an average state legislator, you know that this is a necessary and laudable goal.