“Pardon the intrusion, sir,” she said, “but the parlormaid requested guidance which one was unable to give her without consultation. She reports that she found a copy of Finnegans Wake next to the large aspidistra on the side table, rather than on the floor as usual. At first she assumed it had been tossed there, but on closer inspection it seemed to have been placed rather than tossed. She asked whether she ought to recycle it, as usual, or whether sir had some other destiny in mind for it.”
“She is an intelligent young lady,” we replied, “and she was quite correct to ask for guidance. Sir did indeed place the book there, because sir has finally, after eighty-six years of desultory attempts, read every blessed word of Finnegans Wake.”
“Then is it sir’s desire that the book should be recycled?”
“No,” we said quite definitely. “It is sir’s desire that it should be taken to a reputable service and bronzed.”