TAKE A LETTER, MISS McKEE.

TAKE A LETTER, Miss McKee. To the Quality Novelty Corporation, Ashtabula. You can look up the address later in that thing you look up the addresses in. Gentlemen colon: It has come to my attention that Session No. 47 of your series entitled quote “Easy Rhumba Lessons for the Masses” end quote was sent by mistake to my office at the Schenectady Small Arms & Biscuit Co., that’s C-O-period. Unfortunately, my employees, assuming that the package was intended for this office, opened same and removed the contents. The result has been a number of rhumba-related injuries for which my company has been found liable in the courts of New York State.

New paragraph. While I do not wish to burden you unduly with my misfortunes, I do believe that your company must share at least part of the liability, since it was your shipping department that addressed the package, which I understand was intended for the Schenectady Small Farms & Brisket Savings Bank. In view of that fact, perhaps you could come to some arrangement with your insurance company that would bring comfort to my injured employees without involving both of us in protracted and unpleasant legal proceedings. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Sincerely and so on, J. Rutherford Pinckney, President, Schenectady Small Arms & Biscuit Co., that’s C-O-period.

Now there’s a postscript. P period S period. Please forgive the lack of a written signature at the bottom of this letter, but my arm is currently in a sling.

 

From Dr. Boli’s Encyclopedia of Misinformation.

Shakespeare, William. Shakespeare had intended his Hamlet to be the first play in a comic trilogy; but when his producers hired Francis Beaumont to write the other two parts, Shakespeare had his revenge by rewriting the fifth act and killing off all the major characters. Beaumont’s Fortinbras was a resounding failure, and the proposed third part was never written.