Dear Dr. Boli: Now what? —Sincerely, A Man Standing on the Rail of the Liberty Bridge.

Dear Sir: From the brevity of the question you ask it is impossible for Dr. Boli to determine which of several alternatives you might be looking for. The first thing that occurred to him was that you were looking for the most efficient and safest method of descending from the rail. Dr. Boli therefore advises you that you should descend to the side with the bridge, not the side with the river. The river is a considerably longer descent.

It occurred to Dr. Boli, however, that you might be attempting suicide, in which case you might be looking for a different sort of advice. This is one of the few subjects on which Dr. Boli is not an expert, as he has never successfully committed suicide. At first glance it would seem that the river side would be the choice to make, but further consideration suggests that the river is by no means reliable. For one thing, the Monongahela River is the busiest commercial waterway in the country, and you might well land on a coal barge, which would be undignified. Worse yet, many people actually survive jumps from bridges over the Monongahela and are picked up days later on islands in the Ohio, which is terribly embarrassing. Your best chance of successful suicide might be to go back to the sidewalk, walk to the southern end of the bridge, and attempt to cross the McArdle Roadway while the light is changing.

In any case, Dr. Boli recommends coming down from the railing as soon as possible. One cannot remain standing on the railing of a bridge for very long without attracting unfavorable attention.