CANINE TELEGRAPHY TRAINING. If your dog is a good speller, then he may be qualified for a career in CANINE TELEGRAPHY. A dire shortage of qualified human telegraph operators means that a well-trained dog is almost assured of a good position. We train by positive reinforcement, so that your dog will want to increase his speed to 20 words per minute or more. Bring your dog for a free aptitude test. Canine Telegraphic Academy of North Point Breeze, North Point Breeze.


  1. Jeff says:

    Dit dit dit duh duh duh dit dit dit. Sit. Good boy.

  2. Lucius Lyon says:


    I believe one may profitably combine Mr. Edison’s original Aesthetograph with this Canine Training Academy’s techniques.

  3. mzmadmike says:

    Can we run them for office?

  4. Declan "Sweet Daddy" St.John-Smythe says:

    I was sitting quietly in my study last night listening to the 40 meter amateur radio frequencies when this “JEFF” person sent a proper S.O.S. I had to recall the local militia when he said that his DOG was responsible. Feh!!

  5. DJD says:

    One must be careful in monitoring canine telegraph operators. My labrador Claudius was given a position at the local telegraph office but was fired after one month: the manager found out that instead of sending the messages he was given, Claudius was transmitting lewd and lurid communications to a kennel in Nebraska.

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