WE ASKED SEVERAL well-known public figures to tell us what they were especially thankful for this year. These were their responses.

Bozar the Clown is thankful for the many surviving works of Daniel Burnham.

Nergal-Sharezer the Rabmag is thankful for his long and fruitful business relationship with the planet Saturn, the details of which will not be fully revealed until his posthumous autobiography, It’s Not What You Know, It’s Who You Know.

Miss Una Corda, the notoriously shy concert pianist, is thankful for dark glasses, unlisted telephone numbers, and John Cage’s 4′33″.

H. Albertus Boli is grateful for Yunnan Tippy FOP Special tea, to which he attributes his longevity.

Miss Diana Smoulder, the ravishing heartthrob of the hurdy-gurdy, is thankful for the literally dozens of messages of support she has received from her fans, but she is not particularly thankful for the imperialist stooges and fascist tools of oppression who banned her from the Lemming Aid concerts.

The Great Blando is thankful for daily recreation periods.


  1. Boltok the Rapist says:

    Boltok the Rapist is especially thankful for Johnann Sebastian Bach’s Sinfonia To Cantata #29, We Thank Thee Lord, We Thank Thee.

  2. Scuba Joe says:

    Scuba Joe is especially thankful for the presence of soy lecithin in many processed starches, as the word lecithin is very enjoyable to say.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *