Sir: This morning I slipped as I was walking down the stairs. However, I grasped the rail with my hand, and did not fall to the bottom.

Is any further proof needed that this so-called “gravity” is a myth, foisted on us by university intellectuals to gain lucrative professorships and publishing contracts sponsored by Big Gravity? And we can see why, when the whole edifice of “physics,” by which the universe is asserted to be billions of years old, rests upon “gravity” as its foundation. Were it not for the tragic consequences of this deception, it would be almost laughable. Who, after all, would believe that the universe we see around us today began billions of years ago? My own research into ancient texts indicates that the universe dates back to the Truman administration at the very earliest.

Yet the ridiculous fable of “gravity,” which leads to such absurdities, is taught as fact to our children in the public schools. What has happened to our liberties? Who are these self-appointed “educators” who ensnare our youth with their tales of “Isaac Newton”? Under a democratic government, should not the fundamental principles of science be determined by referendum?

I have written my state representative a strongly worded letter on this subject, and I urge all your readers to do the same. I would also have called her office, but the number she gave me after my speech at the last community meeting was 555-1212, which appears to be incorrect. I suspect she may have accidentally transposed some of the digits.

Sincerely,
Worthington Pomfret IV,
Sewickley Heights