IN THE NEWS.

AFTER ACRIMONIOUS DEBATE, the Grant Borough council has agreed to submit the question of outsourcing the borough fire department to Bangalore to a referendum. A plurality of council favored the move to Bangalore, but supporters were not able to obtain the necessary majority. The rest of council was divided, with four members favoring outsourcing the fire department to Chittagong and three members preferring Vilnius.

Comments

  1. Dr. Bjorn Bjornsen says:

    What’s all this I hear about you having a birthday? One a year is enough!!!!

    Bjorn Bjornsen, M.D., Ph.D., E.I.E.I.O.

  2. As a person ages, they go from eagerly anticipating each birthday as a child, to apathy as an adult, annoyance in middle age, fear in the autumn years, and right back to treating every birthday as a special accomplishment in extreme old age. At the Good Doctor’s advanced age, he’s rolled this particular odometer over so many times I doubt even he remembers what stage he left off on. I bet he’s ignoring the next couple dozen until he can post something along the lines of

    THREE
    HUNDRED
    THREE
    Years have passed since Dr. Boli sprang fully-formed and clad in full armor (and with an already-impressive beard) from the forehead of Marduk, Zeus being busy at the time hurling lightning bolts at people incapable of correctly using a semicolon.

    After all, it won’t be until well into the 2050’s before he can even post that he’s lived
    ONE
    HUNDRED
    ONE
    THOUSAND
    ONE
    HUNDRED
    ONE
    Days.

    So the next several birthdays will pass for Dr. Boli in the usual blur of days, hours, and teatimes. Well, the teatimes won’t pass in a blur, those are to be savored.

  3. raf says:

    As a highly trained consultant, I am appalled at this treatment of symptoms instead of digging for the root cause. The more productive approach would be to outsource the fires; the fire department can then be dealt with through normal attrition, avoiding the trauma associated with union negotiations.

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