Dear Dr. Boli: What makes the days get longer in the spring? A friend of mine attempted to explain it by showing me an illustration involving the earth’s “axis” and the angle of the sun’s rays. But, as I do not hold with the heliocentric heresy, I was forced to terminate our friendship; and, having apparently run out of friends, I turn to you for answers. —Sincerely, Abinadab J. Godleigh, M.Ed., Third-Grade Science Teacher, John Calvin Extremely Traditional Academy, Fairywood.

Dear Sir: The days grow longer in spring because the warmer weather induces the sun to spend more time out of doors. There are those even among the nominal Ptolemaicists who would attribute the warmer weather to the extended hours of sunlight, but Dr. Boli is sure that you will see through their argument and recognize it as nothing less than rank heliocentricism in disguise.


  1. zeppflyer says:

    Dear sir, I was, earlier today, attempting to recall an amusing anecdote which you relayed in your magazine. I find now, though, that it has completely slipped my mind. Please either inform me as to where I can find this story or provide another one of equal or greater humorous content.

    Thank you.

  2. Jerry says:

    I like this illustration. And I also enjoy that the advertisement below your thoughtful post is a commercial of a big red car taking a nose dive into an inflatable swimming pool.

    • Dr. Boli says:

      Dr. Boli himself is never allowed to see the advertisements posted by his hosts at He is always glad to hear that they maintain an appropriate standard of surrealism.

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