IT IS WITH great pleasure that Dr. Boli announces the addition of the magazine First Things to his celebrated Publishing Empire. Many regular readers of both publications will doubtless have questions about the new arrangement. Dr. Boli will attempt to answer these questions in the catechetical format that has become so popular in disseminating information on the World-Wide Web.
Q. How did I get here?
A. If you had been looking for Dr. Boli at his old address, you arrived by means of an HTML redirect. For anyone familiar with HTML, the thing holds no mystery; for other readers, the best way to explain it is that it works by means of sorcery. Nevertheless, you should update your bookmarks, since the demonic forces behind HTML redirects are notoriously unreliable.
Q. Will First Things change radically under the new regime?
A. No. The two magazines will be operated independently. Dr. Boli will continue to edit his own magazine, and the editors of First Things will continue to do whatever it is they do.
Q. Why First Things in particular?
A. Primarily because the price of Cabling Installation & Maintenance was set unrealistically high.
Q. Isn’t First Things sort of a reactionary magazine?
A. Quite so; and reactionaries are never happy unless they have something to react to. Dr. Boli takes great delight in making people happy.
Q. What are Dr. Boli’s politics exactly?
A. Dr. Boli is still registered as a Federalist, but he has never quite forgiven his own party for the Alien and Sedition Acts, though they were passed when he was still a small boy. Since he reached his majority, his primary criterion in bestowing his vote has been whimsy. This year he will probably give his vote to the Socialist Workers Party.
Q. I don’t approve of one of the advertisements in the margin.
A. Don’t you?
Q. I thought I was supposed to be asking the questions.
A. Were you? —In any case, if you disapprove of one of the advertisements, you should remember that clicking on that advertisement costs the advertiser money. Does that suggest a logical course of action?