The Chem-U-Lotic Corporation has announced a recall of all shipments of its new Chem-U-Lotic Universal Solvent product. According to a company spokesman, customers reported receiving shipments of empty bottles with holes in the bottom. An estimated 100% of shipments are affected. Customers may return the empty bottles for a refund.


  1. John M says:

    What are the company’s manufacturing machines made of? Assuming the factory hasn’t also mysteriously disappeared, together with its surroundings.

  2. markm says:

    John, it’s quite simple. There are two vast chemical process lines, converging on the bottling line. First, it puts a measured amount of Part A in the bottle. Then it fills the bottle with Part B and caps it. The trick is getting the bottle to the customer before Part A and Part B react to form the universal solvent…

    Maybe catapults?

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