The arts having progressed considerably since the primitive days of ancient Greece, it is time for a truly up-to-date list of Muses.

Alexis, Muse of Supermarket-Checkout Tabloids.

Madison, Muse of Comic-Book Superhero Franchises.

Olivia, Muse of Telephone Scams.

Kaylee, Muse of First-Person Shooter Games.

Makayla, Muse of Tweets and Facebook Statuses.

Brandy, Muse of 24-Hour News Channels.

Addison, Muse of Acoustic Folk Bands in the Parking Lot of Whole Foods.

Riley, Muse of Installation Art.

Kaitlin, Muse of Texting While Driving.