There is a certain school of philology, which we may call the Crank School, that believes the whole foundation of scientific philology is unsound. Like most forms of crank science, crank philology attributes the current scientific consensus to a giant worldwide conspiracy of all academics.

Dr. Boli has just found a remarkable example of crank philology, which he has added to the Wrong History shelf in his Eclectic Library:

Macedonian – The European Mother Tongue, with dictionary of ancient words still present in today Macedonian language. The all-inclusive PIE substratum of Pelasgo-Proto-Macedonic, i.e. Nashinski (Lat. Nostratic) and its 15,000 years old continuum with explained etymological phonologies from various sources and online dictionaries link-citations. By Basil Chulev, 2018.

For connoisseurs of cranks, here is a whole crank discipline. Apparently much of the intellectual life of North Macedonia is devoted to proving that all the accomplishments of the ancient world were attributable to Macedonians—ethnically the same as today’s Slavic Macedonians—and that nothing of any significance was ever accomplished by Greeks. For just one example, did you know that the middle section of the Rosetta Stone is written in pure Macedonian? Did you know that it had never been successfully translated until just recently, by a pair of Macedonian engineers named Boševski and Tentov? The rest of the world is egregiously misinformed on the subject, but Boševski and Tentov are media darlings in North Macedonia.

All this is merely an excuse to introduce three translations of beautiful ancient Thracian texts that prove to be pure Macedonian:

At the center of the city, I quickly gave cabbage to the beast mouth.

Nephew, are you satiated? Sit here and sip that juice.

If god has fire, you stay here girl and guard wisely at home.

Now, having read those accurate translations, you certainly have a strong desire to know more about the history of Macedonian as the mother of all European languages. Fortunately, Dr. Boli’s Eclectic Library has its own occasional blog, Literary Discoveries, in which you may read all about Your Macedonian Motherland. Otherwise you might have to read Mr. Chulev’s book, which Dr. Boli would not recommend.


  1. The Shadow says:

    Our taste in cranks is similar. I shall have to share crankiness I come across.

  2. The Shadow says:

    Here’s a choice example, though I don’t know if the author’s *seven volume set* rewriting everything we thought we knew about history is online. Here is the (sadly accurate) article from the Wicked Pedia:

    Apparently Jesus was born a Russian around 1400, who knew?

    • Dr. Boli says:

      Dr. Boli is very grateful for the link. He remembered having heard about Fomenkoism years ago, but had lost track of the name. Cranks love statistics, because only a few people in any population understand how statistics work, and the rest will be awed by the veneer of science covering the wormy old wood of the crank theory.

      When much of the population of a small country like Macedonia believes in a grand conspiracy of all the villains in the world to cover up the glories of their past, the thing seems charming and amusing. When it happens in a great power like Germany in the 1930s or, say, Russia today, it is less amusing and more terrifying.

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