The Blandville Engine Company No. 38 Patronymic Pool was won this year by Hiram bar MacO'Neillsonovich Jr. Congratulations! Hiram and his wife Sue are expecting a baby boy any day now.

The Port Authority has asked us to remind Red Line riders to show a little understanding as the agency transitions to its new name, “Pittsburgh Regional Transit.” The transition has made some drivers crankier than usual, but under state law the agency is not allowed to discriminate in hiring on the basis of rudeness.

St. Britney Church will be holding a special No-Holds-Barred Bingo Night this Thursday at 8 p.m. Prizes of up to $25 will be awarded, and paramedics will be standing by.

An inspirational quotation from our inspirational-quote-of-the-day calendar: “In the country of the blonde, the dirty blonde is queen.” We are not sure what our calendar is supposed to be inspiring.

The Blandville Area Concerned Citizens have petitioned city council to declare Bland Street a designated Urban Enterprise Zone, which entitles all small-business owners in the zone to free ice cream every Friday afternoon. Let Councilwoman Stacey Whatsername know your feelings on this important matter.

Have you been wishing you could communicate better with your Latin American neighbors? Yohogania Community College is offering a six-week immersion course in Latin. Sign up now and avoid the rush.

City police called this morning to ask us to remind residents that telephone scammers can victimize anyone. Local police will soon be calling residents to help them protect themselves against identity theft. Be sure to have your Social Security number and bank account information ready when police call, so that they can help you recover your identity if it is stolen.


  1. Baceseras says:

    Is Yohogania an alternative spelling of Youghiogheny? Honest question.

    Also any tips on pronunciation? Or should I just take my chances?

    • Dr. Boli says:

      Yohogania is a Latinization of Youghiogheny, the same way Monongalia (the county with Morgantown as its seat), named at the same time, is a Latinization of Monongahela. It is pronounced “Yo-ho-GAIN-ee-a,” or “Yo-ho-GAIN-ya.”

      Wikipedia explains everything but the pronunciation.

  2. Now if we can just get the Pittsburgh Regional Transit lines far enough North to merge with any such system around Erie, PA, you can change that acronym fully to PERT.

    • Dr. Boli says:

      Or it could be merged with one of the many regional transit authorities in the suburbs, such as—for example—the Mid Mon Valley Transit Authority, so that we could have the P&MMVRTA. A good initialism should be both unique and easy to remember, unlike PRT, which is also used for the Personal Rapid Transit in Morgantown.

  3. RepubAnon says:

    I propose the name: Pittsburgh Entire Region Transit: PERT

    • Dr. Boli says:

      Of course we will probably always have separate regional transit authorities in the suburbs, since even having a single authority for Allegheny County was a triumph of cooperation in a county with 130 separate municipalities. So, to take into account the fact that the Westmoreland County Transit Authority, Mid County Transit Authority, Beaver County Transit Authority, Indiana County Transit Authority, Washington County Transportation Authority, New Castle Area Transit Authority, Mid Mon Valley Transit Authority, Butler Transit Authority, and Fayette Area Coordinated Transportation authority will continue to exist, and that whatever name we choose should reflect the fact that the transit covers only Pittsburgh and inner suburbs, we could rename the Port Authority Pittsburgh Abridged Regional Transit, or PART.

  4. Richard A says:

    Isn’t the new PRT governed by commonwealth law, rather than state law?

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