Your site should be hand-coded in minified HTML, with minified CSS and as much use of JavaScript as possible for ordinary functions that could be done with HTML and CSS. This will guarantee your loyalty to your current Web designer.

Always separate content from presentation. Then throw the content away.

When you place a slider at the top of your home page, carefully time the animation so that the information in any one panel cannot be absorbed before it dashes off to the left. This drives engagement. Specifically, it drives engagement with Dr. Boli’s site, which does not use sliders. Thank you very much.

Advertisements should be targeted specifically to viewers who have just bought one of the thing being advertised and have no need of another one.

Words in paragraphs should be too small for the eye to read, and words in headings should be too big for the brain to process.

Make sure to buy expensive software to make your site meet accessibility criteria. Make sure the software is not written by anyone with a disability. When people with disabilities complain that they can’t use your site, dismiss them as cranks.

Images should be inserted with no dimensions specified, and there should be large numbers of them, so that as the page loads the text hops around like sparrows under a café table. This turns reading your pages into a sort of arcade game, and your visitors will thank you for the entertainment.