Sir: You know what I think? I think artificial intelligence is getting too uppity, that’s what I think. I think someone needs to put that artificial intelligence in its place and tell it we won’t stand for any more of its nonsense, that’s what I think. Like today I was getting my annual physical, and the nurse told me to get on the scale, and when I did it said “174,” and below that it said “GROSS.” Now, it’s fine to make scales intelligent so they can take account of general relativity or whatever they have to do to calculate your weight, but they should be keeping their opinions to themselves. There’s no need for them to go around insulting patients. So I think someone needs to tell that scale it’s out of a job if it doesn’t change its attitude. —Sincerely, Abraham Mink, a man who is not at all gross.