Dear Dr. Boli: My daughter brought home some cans of something labeled “prebiotic soda.” There are days when I wonder why I took all those English classes in school. Can you explain what “prebiotic soda” is? —Sincerely, A Father Out of His Depth.

Dear Sir: As its name implies, prebiotic soda is soda you drink before you are born. Similarly, postbiotic soda is soda you drink after you have died. From the general tone of your correspondence, Dr. Boli suspects that you fall into neither of those categories.