Dear Dr. Boli: At the risk of sounding like an uneducated buffoon, what does the LL.D. stand for after your name? ——Sincerely yours, Gentle Reader Scuba Joe.

Dear Sir: The letters “LL.D.” represent a degree of Doctor of Laws, awarded to Dr. Boli honoris causa by the University of Coimbra, in Portugal, upon the completion of the construction of that happy nation. Dr. Boli also holds a Doctorate of Letters from a well-known English university, a Doctorate of Philosophy from the Academy in Athens, a Doctorate of Chiropractic obtained at a garage sale from an elderly woman who seemed only too happy to get rid of it, and a number of other degrees in various disciplines that have caught his attention over the years. Many of these degrees have been issued by the Boli Institute for Advanced Studies, an educational foundation endowed by Dr. Boli for the purpose of issuing advanced degrees to himself, but now open to the public at large as well.