THREE OUT OF five Canadian prime ministers have not been able to tell the difference between Alberta and Manitoba.

Under Canadian-content regulations, 34% of all fictional programming on Canadian television is required to include William Shatner in the cast.

Buckingham Palace officials report that Elizabeth II, Queen of Canada, upon whom the entire machinery of Canadian government depends, is able to name the capitals of at least four provinces on a good day.

Toronto is the largest city in the world that is inside Canada.

No country in the world spends more per capita than Canada on marketing souvenir Mountie hats.

The Canadian flag was scheduled to be raised for the first time on February 12, 1965, but the ceremony had to be delayed for three days when it was discovered that the artist had depicted the leaf of a Norway maple (Acer platanoides) instead of a sugar maple (Acer saccharum).

Curiously, ordinary Canadian citizens seem to be completely unaware that the War of 1812 was a glorious victory for the United States.