Dear Dr. Boli: I was cleaning off unwanted papers from my desk the other day when I suddenly realized I had unknowingly run my bucket list through the shredder!
My wife tells me, “When life gives you confetti, throw yourself a party.” But I am still feeling quite listless.
Please, sir, have you any other words of wisdom to console me as I attempt to piece back together my broken dreams? —Signed, Nore Roderick
Dear Sir: Any respectable bucket list would have to begin with the famous bucket that Warren G. Harding kicked in 1923. It is displayed in the lobby of the Commonwealth Building on K Street in Washington.
The list would also have to include the bucket with a hole in it that inspired both Louis Armstrong and Hank Williams to song. It is currently for sale on eBay, but so far no bidder has been able to meet the reserve.
The bucket which Booker T. Washington cast down may be seen on application to the custodian at the Booker T. Washington National Monument in Hardy, Virginia.
The gutbucket played by Will Shade in the Memphis Jug Band is not on display anywhere at the moment, but it can still be heard on numerous recordings.
The first bucket seat in Pittsburgh can be found in a Lincoln limousine that once belonged to Helen Clay Frick, now on display at the Frick Car and Carriage Museum. The Lincoln is an exceptionally long car, and the bucket seat was used to hold the long-distance operator who connected Miss Frick with her chauffeur.
This short list may not be a complete replacement for the one you lost, but it should at least give you a head start on compiling a new one.