It is considered bad form to wear a baseball cap to a funeral unless the deceased is also wearing a baseball cap. Check with relatives before the ceremony.

Mao suits are “in” this fall.

Ladies may obtain the effect of fashionable high-heeled shoes without the inconvenience by means of a judicious use of trompe-l’oeil painting.

If you are a classical musician, remember that the same dress that wins applause at the symphony can get you arrested for soliciting three blocks away.

Before you wear a T-shirt with the logo of a heavy-metal band on it to church, check on line to see whether the band is embarrassingly passé.

If you are considering a tattoo, make sure to remind the artist that you want a design that expresses your own irreducible individuality. Then pick the same tattoo all the other cool kids are getting.

Labor Day is coming up soon, so remember to burn your white shoes, or drop them off at a local public incinerator station.