Let’s reject their greetings with a righteous sneer.
Let’s be clear that we won’t stand for any jolly days.
Let’s be dour and sour, just like we are all year.
(It keeps the Christ in Christmas.)
Let’s insult some random strangers on the internet.
Let’s be mean to people we don’t even know.
Out on social media, let us spread our winter net:
When we trap those sinners, how our hearts will glow!
(With righteousness, of course.)
Let us bait our traps
And set ’em.
Soon or late our traps
Will net ’em.
They may hate our traps,
But let ’em
All berate our traps.
We’ll get ’em.
When we get a card that tells us “Season’s Greetings,”
Let us stamp it down into the roadside sludge.
Let’s recite a list of traitors at our meetings:
For ’tis after all the time of year to judge.
(It’s what Jesus would do.)
